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60

 

Then Baba came to see my mother. She was seriously ill. But I never had realized that she had to suffer, that she ever could have been unhappy. I was a late child and I was young and I did not see any reason why my mother should be unhappy. When Baba came she cried, and in front of Baba, for the first time, I saw the suffering that came out of her. Baba took her in his arms and said "A bird that has been always free, does not realize its freedom like a bird that has been caged and is freed." I said "Mummy, don't cry!" But Baba made me be silent and let her weep out all she had suffered in her life. And I thought she will be healthy again, a great miracle will happen, Baba has taken all from her.

 

Baba stayed one month in Harmon and I went out to see him as often as I could. Once he went to Sing-Sing, and we drove around the prison. I was totally innocent and didn't worry who was in Sing-Sing or what problems were in the world, I was like in heaven, only aware of Baba's presence. All of a sudden Baba put a foulard scarf over his head. It was the first time I saw this and thought it very funny and couldn't imagine what and why he was doing so. When Baba took the foulard off he looked at me and said "Anita, make me laugh!" In Baba's presence I could invent all sorts of incredible stories, make fun and invent fantastic things. It just flew out of me, out of my overflowing joy. We were so intimate, so extremely near to Baba; he never said that he was God, he only used the expression "the Ancient One". Norina would cry all the time, Elizabeth was of tremendous earnestness, Jean was a kind of ethereal figure passing through space, Malcolm was the poet, seizing all kinds of inspiration, Meredith was lecturing, he "knew". I myself was just happy. I never took all those things seriously, the only thing I took seriously was my love for Baba, his extreme beauty, his sensitivity and his tremendous sense of humor.

 

Once he asked us "Do any of you know who you were in the times of Christ?" He called one after the other, but not me, I was terrified, what should I say? I felt that I hardly could remember what was yesterday, how could I remember anything so far away. Baba said quietly "No use my telling it to you. You must experience it for yourself."

 

After a month in Harmon with excursions to New York and Boston, Baba left for Paris. He had asked me where he should stay and I suggested the Hotel Powers, a very nice place near the Champs Elysees. I stayed back in New York to look after my mother.

 

 

 

Experiencing Meher Baba's Love
From a talk by Jack C. Small, given at Bethesda, MD, 1983.

 

There is a message that Beloved Avatar Meher Baba gave to those of His lovers who have not seen Him with their eyes, who have not met Him in the body! "You have received what I have come to give."

 

The purpose of Baba's coming in human form is for us to experience Him in the heart, and each one of us has indeed received what Baba came to give. Because we have rece ived His love, because we are here tonight, each one of us has received the grace of His advent — which is the experience of His love in our hearts.

 

The purpose of seeing Baba with the eyes is to love Him with the heart. There are those who have seen Him with their eyes but didn't feel Him in their hearts. Each one of us has received what Meher Baba has come to give. We have not missed out because we have not met Him in the body or seen Him with our eyes; we have each received the grace of His advent — which is to awaken love in the heart. Each one of us has had the real meeting with Meher Baba.

 

I remember when I first met Bill LePage, an old-time Baba lover from Australia, who had Baba's darshan in the early 50s and spent time with Baba in India. I asked him the question I invariably asked people who had met Baba — "What was it like to meet Baba?" He replied, "You know, it was the same as when you met Him in your heart." I realized he was right. This was the real meeting — in the heart. Each one of us has met

 

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