but union with God."

"No. That only is real," he replied. "All else is illusion. Union is like the sun -- it is permanent. All else is like the clouds that come and go. I have had you much in mind since your letter," he continued. "You are right when you say that ecstatic experience is not enough. The veil must be completely lifted. It is not enough to puncture it here and there with holes. I have everything chalked out. First, Jean must have here a complete overhauling. Until that is over, she will need you. When that is over -- and it will be, by August -- I will start cutting Malcolm to pieces."

"Good!" I answered.

"You will have union;" Baba continued. “But at what a price!"

"Is there any price too great to pay for union?" I asked.

"No," he replied -- and then got down to practical details.

"Will you do as I say?" he inquired.

"Of course," I replied.

"Fast?"

I assented.

"On only water?"

Again I agreed.

"For three months?"

“For as long as you want," I responded.

"May I lock you up?"

"Of course, if you wish."

"Good," he nodded. "August, September, October will be ideal. Until then, take care of Jean, write your experiences with me, get the magazine in shape. Then I will take you in hand."

So -- August, September, October -- exit Malcolm, enter Baba! Speed the day, and speed the process!

Kabir, in a couplet which Baba translated for us one day at Nasik, tells why we have to grow gradually into the fullness of permanent attainment.

"One cannot start running at full speed," the couplet begins. "One must gather momentum and gradually increase the speed.

"If one is to be stained with a spiritual color, one must be stained gradually. The color takes time to penetrate. For it to become deep and rich, it must be applied gradually.

"The mind, which has been sleeping the sleep of ignorance for ages, can only gradually be awakened to knowledge."

Often, in the years following this period, I have wondered whether this rejection of seed ideas in my attempt to pass through the world of creative ideas to reach the Source was justifiable, or whether it was merely a subtle expression of self-will, an attempt to force a situation which might better have been left to unfold as gradually and naturally as a blossom develops into a fruit. One hesitates (or at least I have hesitated) to discuss problems like this with Baba. It is doubtful whether they can be resolved by intellectual discussion, anyway. It has always seemed to me that they must await that moment in the unfoldment of the individual consciousness, when through actual experience, one knows the answer.

Nevertheless, it was encouraging to discover, while perusing Bucke's "Cosmic Consciousness", in January, 1942, the following, contained in an article on Plotinus quoted by Bucke from "The Encyclopedia Britannica": " . . .it is not enough to be sinless, one must become 'God'. This is reached through contemplation of the primeval Being, the One; or, in other words, through an ecstatic approach to it. Thought cannot attain to this, for thought reaches only to the nous and is itself a kind of motion. Thought is a mere preliminary to communion with God. It is only in a state of perfect passivity and repose that the soul can recognize and touch the primeval Being. Hence in order to reach this highest attainment the soul must pass through a spiritual curriculum.