So I made a supreme effort and rose above myself; the tears were checked and swallowed back, and I felt nothing.
During the next half-hour, as we followed to the entrance gate and stood watching for his plane to take off, it was not possible for me to hold the tears back altogether, however there was the will to obey. I thought, "What we feel, He feels, so to save Him pain, we must not feel the pain."
Since that day, so often when I think of Him the tears come into my eyes and sometimes I find myself sobbing, I who was so hard and dry for so many years. Then I tell myself, "Stop this wallowing in pleasurable emotion! He said, 'No, don't cry.' So get on with your job and don't make such a fuss." And turning from the sublime to the ridiculous, the tears change to laughter—laughter at the creation, His Mighty Joke.
Baba once said new material shedding light on His previous Avataric life as Jesus would be found during this one. An ancient Coptic manuscript containing 114 sayings attributed to Jesus has been found recently—the so-called "Gospel of Thomas." Many of the sayings and parables have no parallel in the four Gospels we know. It appears to be an apocryphal work compiled by a Gnostic and dating in part from the second century after Christ. Some of the "pearls" are:
"Split a piece of wood —I am there; lift the stone and you will find me there."